South Carolina: Rain, History, Nature and Finding Family
This past week I had some ups and downs on my family history journey. It felt like a long week.
I was able to attend the Columbia, SC Temple on Thursday. I think that was the highlight of my week. :) Tiniest temple I've ever attended.
I spent an entire week in Charleston, South Carolina, then moved briefly over to the Aiken, SC area for 2 days, and now I'm in North Carolina. (Rockingham area) I've been able to get a lot of research done and I've learned a lot about the southern way of life, good and bad. Some days my head is spinning and I have a huge headache. Some days it rains nonstop and I can't get out to do some of the things I would like to do. Some days I'm just so exhausted I don't even want to keep going the next day.
But I always try to assess and figure out what's going on inside me so that I can fix it and get over it. On the days that my head is spinning and bursting with information, I try to take a break and, if possible, get outside in the fresh air for a while. And when I'm exhausted, I try to go to bed early and take a Tylenol PM to ensure a quality night of sleep. And I've been doing yoga. That helps.
I have also had to do the occasional attitude check. My mantra right now is to treat this period of time like it's my actual job. I get up, exercise, shower, and "go to work". This is what I wanted to do. This is what I chose to do. So when it gets hard at times, I have to give myself a pep talk. I know that a lot of people would love to trade places with me - to go travel and have adventures for a year. So I try to always be grateful and to have an attitude of gratitude every day. That helps.
Some days, I'm just lonely. I miss Scott. I'd love to have some company. I live for his phone call every day, usually around dinner time. Sometimes I call someone. Sometimes I send a card or a letter to someone. And I always try to smile to everyone that I pass by. It's easy to feel like I'm alone in this world, but that's what Satan wants me to think and feel. I have to remind myself that I'm not alone. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are with me every day. Everyone else is just a phone call away.
A family history miracle from this past week: I figured out where my 8th great grandfather, William Norman had property back in the late 1600s and early 1700s. It all came together on the last 2 days that I was in the Charleston area. I "happened" upon a library across the parking lot from a store that I needed to go into. They "happened" to have some amazing information that I had never seen before.
The clues were that William Norman received a land grant for 320 acres for a plantation called Burton, and later called Fairspring. Another clue was that the land was on a peninsula between the Ashley River and Dorchester Creek, and also downstream from Bacon's Bridge. I had Mr. Google show me on a map where all of these locations were. And then my jaw dropped.
He lived at or near Fort Dorchester - where I had already been a few days before!! This is where I had had a spiritual experience walking up to the old church there, even causing my eyes to tear up. It all made sense now. I drove back over there one more time before leaving town the next day, just to see it once more, but this time with more understanding. It was pouring rain so I didn't get out of the car, but I just drove around slowly and felt connected to my long-ago family. It was really hard to leave.
I think that was the catalyst that sent me into a slump. Just when I "found" family, I had to leave them behind. I cried a lot that day. And nothing in the few days since has been even remotely as fulfilling as that. Except for going to the temple. The temple is such a blessing in my life. I'm grateful that there is the occasional temple in my path as I travel from state to state. It keeps me in a good place in so many ways.
In the Aiken, SC area, I discovered a genealogical society nearby that had 24 of my surnames in vertical files there. TWENTY-FOUR!! I was there for 5 hours taking picture after picture of documents and miscellaneous papers. I still need to review those at some point . . . .
This area of South Carolina professes to have MORE peaches than Georgia!! I was in awe as I passed orchard after orchard for miles!! There's even a huge peach orchard across the street from my AirBnb in Ellerbe, NC right now. The peach trees are just starting to bloom right now and they are so pretty!!
Saturday, I had another special day. This time it was on an errand for the Harmon side of the family. I had been in contact with my mother-in-law, Coy Harmon, to get information about the Murphy family that lived in Union County, SC long, long ago. Some of them joined the church during the time of Joseph Smith, and gave a lot to help build up the church and move out west. But some were buried in Union County, and I went on a mission to find them yesterday.
First, I went to Padgett's Creek Baptist Church, mainly because we knew that the Murphy's attended church here at one point, but also because this was the only definitive address that I had at first.
The cemetery was huge and I didn't have a list of who was buried here. I called Coy, and while talking to her, I wandered up and down all the rows, occasionally finding some Murphy's to take a picture of their headstone.
But what I REALLY wanted was to find the 2 small family cemeteries where we KNEW her direct ancestors were buried. I was out in the middle of nowhere, with no internet, and was barely able to get a phone call to go through. But I saw a man across the street, so I ran over to talk to him. Because why not? He told me that he knew of a Murphy at the end of the road, about 2 miles down from his place. So off I went.
Pause the story here. My bladder was about to explode. All I could think about was how much I wanted to find a Murphy so that I could possibly use their bathroom. One mile down the road, I hit my brakes hard. Are you serious? Out in the middle of nowhere there was a bathroom. I actually thanked Heavenly Father for this amazing vault bathroom. :)
And as it turned out, this is on what used to be Murphy property!! It's now part of the Sumter National Forest and has a trailhead here - thus the bathroom.
And then I met some Murphy's!! R.D. Murphy, Jr. (Richard Dewey) is 69 years old and is the family historian. He knows all the information and all the stories. He is friendly, chatty, and just a cutie pie. I was able to gather the family together for a photo out front. R.D. lives with his wife, Ann, their son, Shawn and his wife Dana, and three grandchildren.
Back row left to right: Shawn, Dana, Ann and R.D. Murphy
Front row: Sam, Alyson, and Hayleigh Murphy
R.D. took me out on his property to visit family cemetery #1: the Murphy Family Cemetery. Buried here are about 30 family members, many of which their headstone is just a stone marker with no identification. But I found Sarah Duke Murphy, a Revolutionary War Patriot (for providing goods and food to the troops).
R.D. also hopped in my car and we drove down the same road about 3/4 of a mile, looking for a marker on a tree. Once we found that, we parked and started walking back behind the marked tree and into the pines. He explained that he had tied an occasional ribbon to trees leading back to the family plot in order to mark the way. But not too many ribbons, he said, because then someone would inevitably come and steal the headstone!! I could not fathom why anyone would steal a headstone with someone else's name on it. But apparently the granite headstone makes a great step on someone's property or wherever else they need one. So he led the way and I followed humbly behind him.
Here is the family plot. So remote, and yet so beautiful.
This time, I found Mark and Holly Duke Murphy, Scott's 4th great grandparents. What a special feeling to find the family of my family!! When I sent some pictures later to my mother-in-law, she said it made her cry. She said she's seen many pictures over the years of the headstones, but to have me IN the photo made it much more personal. She's always wanted to go and see for herself, but hasn't been able to get out there. I had fun going on an errand for her.
And that's about the size of my week so far. I'm in North Carolina for a few more days and I'll be in Virginia by next weekend. Three days of rain in the forecast begin tomorrow, so we'll see what I'm able to accomplish. One day at a time. Just breathe. And be grateful.
I spent an entire week in Charleston, South Carolina, then moved briefly over to the Aiken, SC area for 2 days, and now I'm in North Carolina. (Rockingham area) I've been able to get a lot of research done and I've learned a lot about the southern way of life, good and bad. Some days my head is spinning and I have a huge headache. Some days it rains nonstop and I can't get out to do some of the things I would like to do. Some days I'm just so exhausted I don't even want to keep going the next day.
But I always try to assess and figure out what's going on inside me so that I can fix it and get over it. On the days that my head is spinning and bursting with information, I try to take a break and, if possible, get outside in the fresh air for a while. And when I'm exhausted, I try to go to bed early and take a Tylenol PM to ensure a quality night of sleep. And I've been doing yoga. That helps.
I have also had to do the occasional attitude check. My mantra right now is to treat this period of time like it's my actual job. I get up, exercise, shower, and "go to work". This is what I wanted to do. This is what I chose to do. So when it gets hard at times, I have to give myself a pep talk. I know that a lot of people would love to trade places with me - to go travel and have adventures for a year. So I try to always be grateful and to have an attitude of gratitude every day. That helps.
Some days, I'm just lonely. I miss Scott. I'd love to have some company. I live for his phone call every day, usually around dinner time. Sometimes I call someone. Sometimes I send a card or a letter to someone. And I always try to smile to everyone that I pass by. It's easy to feel like I'm alone in this world, but that's what Satan wants me to think and feel. I have to remind myself that I'm not alone. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are with me every day. Everyone else is just a phone call away.
A family history miracle from this past week: I figured out where my 8th great grandfather, William Norman had property back in the late 1600s and early 1700s. It all came together on the last 2 days that I was in the Charleston area. I "happened" upon a library across the parking lot from a store that I needed to go into. They "happened" to have some amazing information that I had never seen before.
The clues were that William Norman received a land grant for 320 acres for a plantation called Burton, and later called Fairspring. Another clue was that the land was on a peninsula between the Ashley River and Dorchester Creek, and also downstream from Bacon's Bridge. I had Mr. Google show me on a map where all of these locations were. And then my jaw dropped.
He lived at or near Fort Dorchester - where I had already been a few days before!! This is where I had had a spiritual experience walking up to the old church there, even causing my eyes to tear up. It all made sense now. I drove back over there one more time before leaving town the next day, just to see it once more, but this time with more understanding. It was pouring rain so I didn't get out of the car, but I just drove around slowly and felt connected to my long-ago family. It was really hard to leave.
I think that was the catalyst that sent me into a slump. Just when I "found" family, I had to leave them behind. I cried a lot that day. And nothing in the few days since has been even remotely as fulfilling as that. Except for going to the temple. The temple is such a blessing in my life. I'm grateful that there is the occasional temple in my path as I travel from state to state. It keeps me in a good place in so many ways.
In the Aiken, SC area, I discovered a genealogical society nearby that had 24 of my surnames in vertical files there. TWENTY-FOUR!! I was there for 5 hours taking picture after picture of documents and miscellaneous papers. I still need to review those at some point . . . .
This area of South Carolina professes to have MORE peaches than Georgia!! I was in awe as I passed orchard after orchard for miles!! There's even a huge peach orchard across the street from my AirBnb in Ellerbe, NC right now. The peach trees are just starting to bloom right now and they are so pretty!!
Saturday, I had another special day. This time it was on an errand for the Harmon side of the family. I had been in contact with my mother-in-law, Coy Harmon, to get information about the Murphy family that lived in Union County, SC long, long ago. Some of them joined the church during the time of Joseph Smith, and gave a lot to help build up the church and move out west. But some were buried in Union County, and I went on a mission to find them yesterday.
First, I went to Padgett's Creek Baptist Church, mainly because we knew that the Murphy's attended church here at one point, but also because this was the only definitive address that I had at first.
The cemetery was huge and I didn't have a list of who was buried here. I called Coy, and while talking to her, I wandered up and down all the rows, occasionally finding some Murphy's to take a picture of their headstone.
But what I REALLY wanted was to find the 2 small family cemeteries where we KNEW her direct ancestors were buried. I was out in the middle of nowhere, with no internet, and was barely able to get a phone call to go through. But I saw a man across the street, so I ran over to talk to him. Because why not? He told me that he knew of a Murphy at the end of the road, about 2 miles down from his place. So off I went.
Pause the story here. My bladder was about to explode. All I could think about was how much I wanted to find a Murphy so that I could possibly use their bathroom. One mile down the road, I hit my brakes hard. Are you serious? Out in the middle of nowhere there was a bathroom. I actually thanked Heavenly Father for this amazing vault bathroom. :)
And as it turned out, this is on what used to be Murphy property!! It's now part of the Sumter National Forest and has a trailhead here - thus the bathroom.
And then I met some Murphy's!! R.D. Murphy, Jr. (Richard Dewey) is 69 years old and is the family historian. He knows all the information and all the stories. He is friendly, chatty, and just a cutie pie. I was able to gather the family together for a photo out front. R.D. lives with his wife, Ann, their son, Shawn and his wife Dana, and three grandchildren.
Back row left to right: Shawn, Dana, Ann and R.D. Murphy
Front row: Sam, Alyson, and Hayleigh Murphy
R.D. took me out on his property to visit family cemetery #1: the Murphy Family Cemetery. Buried here are about 30 family members, many of which their headstone is just a stone marker with no identification. But I found Sarah Duke Murphy, a Revolutionary War Patriot (for providing goods and food to the troops).
R.D. also hopped in my car and we drove down the same road about 3/4 of a mile, looking for a marker on a tree. Once we found that, we parked and started walking back behind the marked tree and into the pines. He explained that he had tied an occasional ribbon to trees leading back to the family plot in order to mark the way. But not too many ribbons, he said, because then someone would inevitably come and steal the headstone!! I could not fathom why anyone would steal a headstone with someone else's name on it. But apparently the granite headstone makes a great step on someone's property or wherever else they need one. So he led the way and I followed humbly behind him.
Here is the family plot. So remote, and yet so beautiful.
This time, I found Mark and Holly Duke Murphy, Scott's 4th great grandparents. What a special feeling to find the family of my family!! When I sent some pictures later to my mother-in-law, she said it made her cry. She said she's seen many pictures over the years of the headstones, but to have me IN the photo made it much more personal. She's always wanted to go and see for herself, but hasn't been able to get out there. I had fun going on an errand for her.
And that's about the size of my week so far. I'm in North Carolina for a few more days and I'll be in Virginia by next weekend. Three days of rain in the forecast begin tomorrow, so we'll see what I'm able to accomplish. One day at a time. Just breathe. And be grateful.
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